Thursday, 31 December 2015

2015

Remember my anxieties for 2015...( hello January )
Well it turned out pretty good!

I feel so thankful that I made it through things that I was completely scared about and felt incapable to do. I'm thankful that other people see something in me, that sometimes, I don't see myself and I'm thankful that the universe takes me places that I wouldn't normally volunteer to go. Of course anxiety has accompanied me through every step of 2015 but I still did things that quite frankly I'm proud of.

So here's my little recap of 2015:

January

-I started working full time (1/2 student, 1/2 real work)
-A friend's engagement party 
-Coffee with friends 
-Lunches in town with mam

February 

-Had a nice meal at Prezzo with friends on Valentine's day
-Made some Nutella and strawberry filled pancakes 
-Coffee with colleagues
-Eastenders LIVE





March

-Celebrated a friend's birthday with an indian 
-Got offered a job :)
-A cold and windy walk on the beach 
-Bought myself a new laptop

April

-Easter dinner and games 
-Sunny day in Cardiff
-We had baby chicks in work 
-Ben Howard in concert


 May

-Gerard's last game for Liverpool
-Eurovision, nibbles and Desperado (Sweden won!)
-Went to see Pitch Perfect 2 in cinema

June  

-Bought James Bay's Chaos and the Calm
-Started watching the series Humans
- A walk around Craig-y-nos


July

-Celebrated my birthday with a day trip to Gloucester
-Red arrows
-Fruit coolers in Costa


August

-Beach walk
-Went to see Jurassic World in the cinema
-Day out with friends in Tenby

September 

-Family wedding 
- Unemployment and feelings of guilt
-Went to see Dreamboats and Miniskirts
-Lunar eclipse


October

- Went to see Blood Brothers 
- Back in work  
-Went to a friend's Hen do

November

-  A friend's wedding
- Afternoon tea with friends
- Food in Mamma Mia's

December 

-Christmas do
-Scary interview but I got the job!
-Bought myself an iphone6 
- Night out with friends
- A lovely Christmas with family  

Sunday, 13 December 2015

Have yourself a merry little Christmas...

It's been a while!

Since last time, I was offered a temporary job-accepted it- felt incredibly anxious and realised maybe this job wasn't for me- plucked up the courage to phone back two days later and turn down the job- was told that they wanted me for the job and wasn't going to take no for an answer- accepted the job again- started the job- realised I was actually okay at this job- applied for a permanent job in the same workplace- had a scary interview- and got the job!! PHEW.

I should be happy, yes? I should take it as a sign that I am doing a good job and that I am wanted, yes?

I'm still anxious. I'm still scared. I still feel that I'm going to do something terribly wrong and that I'm not going to be good enough. This sucks.

BUT on the more positive side...Christmas holidays are coming soon and I can spend time with loved ones.  I can listen to my new Nashville Christmas CD I bought today- woop!


Here are some lovely pictures taken from pinterest to cheer us all up:
Pinterest
www.stephsayshello.co.uk

Pinterest
Pinterest  
Tumblr       
Pinterest
How special and cosy is that last picture? Such a dream!

Sunday, 25 October 2015

Lovely Autumn


There seems to be so much love for Autumn at the moment and it is lovely to see.

I've really been enjoying reading blogs from people everywhere embracing candles, coffee and cwtchy days in AND.... I have been loving the beautiful photos of leaves and trees and cosy colours! 

Awww Autumn

 Here is my own lovely autumn photo collection....

A white hot chocolate from #Coffee1- highly recommend!
Love the rich and rustic colours!
Seeing beautiful leaves as you're out shopping and knowing that you need to take them home

A little autumn sketch



Tuesday, 6 October 2015

Dear friend...



Dear friend, 

I know you are struggling. You think that if you didn’t have to leave your bed, you’d be okay. 

Let me tell you: You are okay. You’re more than okay. You have a gift no one else has. A GREAT light is within you. 

You think too much about a lot of things but you never think about that greatness inside you. You don’t believe me, but I’m telling you it’s true. 

Stay in bed today if that’s what you need, but, tomorrow... welcome the world, accept its good points and bad, smile at the craziness of it all and start turning that light within you ON! 

I’m here for you when things are a little scary and so is your bed, but remember...
 there you are only resting 
because when you've finished resting, there's a world waiting for something only you can give them. 

Lots of love, 
A friend you should listen to. 

Sunday, 27 September 2015

Little boosts: why we all need them now and again...

Living with anxiety can be really hard; like a record stuck replaying the same noise over and over and over again. You want to lift the needle and to stop it from scratching but you just can't. I have had some thoughts replaying in my mind for days now and these thoughts were playing in my head over 2 years ago too. You'd think I would have learnt to shut them off or to deal with them but no.

When you've got these negative, draining and irritable thoughts playing on the record of your mind it is nice to have some nice words said to give you a little boost. To have a reminder of the power of good, sincere and uplifting words is a reaaallllyyy nice break from anxious words said to yourself. 

So, here I introduce to you:

Emotional Baggage Check
 
emotionalbaggagecheck.com
 On this website you can Check in emotional baggage and spill some of your worries and thoughts to a stranger. Another person can then choose to Carry it (it being your emotional baggage) and can send you some lovely words back in response. What I particularly love about this website is the element of sending music; when a person responds and chooses to 'carry it' they are expected to send a song along with their message. I don't think I have spoken much about my personal love for music and how much it helps me with my anxiety. I reeaaalllyyy think music is a powerful thing.

Anyway this is what the website states is their purpose:
'The purpose of Emotional Baggage check is to spread a little kindness through music and a heartfelt message. We believe that lyrics and words can lend a little comfort and be an opportunity for expression'
Isn't that lovely? I personally have checked in some of my baggage and I have also carried someone else's baggage and I think of it as a little boost when you need it or when someone else needs it.

Another website I love that certainly gives me a little boost is:
 

 The Pep Talk Generator 

Go there now!!!

This is a project by Babe Vibes and was designed by Kara Haupt and developed by Paige Lewis. If ever you need a pep talk this is the place to go. I love the idea of speaking to someone to encourage, motivate and inspire. I am definitely in need of these lovely, kind, and punchy words to make me believe in myself and what I have to offer the world. It is powerful how words sent from awesome babes can change your thinking even if it is just for a minute (but I really hope it has an everlasting effect).

Please do comment if you know of any other little boosts we all need now and again!! Thank you x

Sunday, 13 September 2015

Quote of the Week!

How are you feeling lately?
I get waves of sadness now, and again. I think it's fear in disguise. I'm scared of what is ahead of me but I'm hoping that I have nothing to be fearful of. I really want to believe that good things are right around the corner and that I need to just travel along my own path without doubting my every step. We'll see where I end up!

Here is my quote of the week by the very great, Dr Seuss:



You're off to great places.
Today is your day.
Your mountain is waiting, 
so get on your way. 
-Dr Seuss 

What mountain is waiting for you?

 

Tuesday, 8 September 2015

Let's write!

I want to try something new. I want to write. This may be completely embarrassing and rubbish but I'm going to do it anyway. Inspired by Vivatramp and her creative prompts these are some writings; poems; words typed.

Half light 

Together we are all glowing;
although, all that is seen is half light.
For buried beneath our appearance
is darkness that can't ever ignite.

The light is always favoured
as darkness just hurts inside,
but, it is the dark that should be admired
as it struggles to break free and to glide.

Maps

From Highcliffe to Romsey
to where I call home.
It is there I'll discover
the journey I have been on.


Thanks for reading!
These prompts were part of the August post, however, there is now September prompts! Read them here: 20 Creative Prompts

Monday, 24 August 2015

Love list

Hello!

During my time off, I have had some (lovely) time to internet browse and to get inspired by super-cool bloggers. I would love to be a super-cool blogger but instead I bring you a positive post with a list of loves. So today, I have a list of some things I want to do, some things I want to buy and some things that I just love.

1.#LovetoRead


Elle Luna, The Crossroads of Should and Must

Source: topista


I came across this on pinterest and now I feel like I NEED to read it. Has anyone read it? I would love to know your thoughts.

2. #LovetoHave


A nice long bath with this Brightside Bubble Bar
Source: Lush 

3. #LovetoDrink


Green tea, lime and mint fruit cooler from Costa

Seriously yummy; try it!




4. #LoveonTwitter 


I really love this picture that @FreePeople tweeted:

Source: @FreePeople



5. #LovetoListen


Biscuits- Kacey Musgraves 

This is just one of those songs where you can't help but LOVE every lyric; catchy, country and creative! 

Source: Tumblr

 What are you loving lately? Any recommendations?  

Monday, 3 August 2015

Quote of the Week: A Sweet Summer

Some people see Summer as a chance to get away; to jet off to some lovely unjourneyed location to have a little taste of bliss for a week or more. I'm not going to lie the idea of escaping to holiday in France or Italy does sound lovely to me but I can't let it ruin my summer of being home. Yesterday I sat in the garden gazing at the clouds floating amongst the sea of perfect blue. It was a perfect day to get snapping and take pretty pictures.

Here are those pictures (edited to look even more picturesque) along with one of my favourite quotes:



"With freedom, books, flowers and the moon, 
who could not be happy?"
Oscar Wilde 
 

 


Sunday, 19 July 2015

Quote of the Week: Eat, Pray, Love

Hello again!

I haven't blogged in a while because work has really gotten the best of me; I've been too tired to do anything! However, I am now on summer holidays so I can finally pace myself and do more of the things I want/need to do.

This week's quote of the week comes from the book Eat, Pray, Love. This book is full of quotable quotes and really is full of wise words so picking one quote was not very easy.


 I loved reading this book and I would read a chapter at a time when I needed an escape and some words of comfort. Anyone who reads this blog will be aware that I do struggle with anxiety and sometimes depression- as much as I want to be positve sometimes my energy or aura won't allow me to be. This book was a true recollection of a woman who was not in a good place emotionally, mentally or spiritually and plans a journey to Rome, India and Bali to discover and practice the art of pleasure, the art of devotion and the art of balance. I was transported to these countries alongside her and I felt such an escape from my own worries and insecurities. I would like to think that one day I could do something like that- go on a spiritual and physical journey- but for now I think it's best I take little steps to improve my self.

Anyway onto the quote....

I chose this quote as I feel that it highlights our own uniqueness as people. None of us are the same. We are all different. We experience different experiences and we even experience the experiences differently. I sometimes feel bad when I am so different to everyone else, when I am not at the same 'stage of life' as people my age, but I really shouldn't. I need to learn to 'take whatever works from whenever you can find it, and keep moving toward the light'. 

Have any of you read this book? What are your favourite quotes from the book? 

Tuesday, 26 May 2015

Quote of the Week: Strength

For a while now I have been quietly wishing for more strength.

Anxiety often makes you feel weak, incapable and small and so I wished to be a little stronger.
I wanted to be resilient. To be able to bounce back from any difficulty. To move on from upset. To be a little stronger than I felt I was.

Sometimes anxiety and depression can both seem to be words that contrast with strength. Some people feel that you cannot be both a depressed person and a strong person. I feel like you can. I feel despite my negative patterned mind that I am getting stronger. That I do have strength within me. Anxiety and depression still live within me but they live together with strength.

We are stronger than we know.

Here is a reminder for everyone:


Sunday, 3 May 2015

Stop overthinking!!

Yes this is a message to me and anyone else who spends their free time overthinking about everything!! Stop!!

Easier said then done? Of course; isn't that always the truth?

So how do we stop overthinking?

I find pinterest a good place to start. So I type: 'stop overthinking' into the search bar and lovely illustrations, quotes and articles of interest pop up. I do love pinterest.

One picture grabs my attention and I follow the link to this blog post: how to stop overthinking everything = perfect!  I love how the internet can connect you with what you need so easily.

    
Source: http://www.thequietlife.me
This post gives tips on how to stop overthinking which includes:

1) Put it on paper
I like this idea. I think writing down what's on your mind in a way processes it. It makes you see your worries on paper and you can choose, to write down further notes about what you can do to ease these worries, or you could scrunch the paper up and put it in the bin. This visual activity of what your overthinking about could help you stop.

2) Breathe and re-focus
Now I know breathing exercises helps many people but I personally do not find it so helpful. I don't like concentrating on my breathing and I get bored easily and do not take it seriously. So for me, I would change this tip to 2) Close your eyes and listen to music as this makes me sit quietly and focus on the moment.

3) Talk to yourself about it
 I think this is a good tip to try. We can often be hard on ourselves. I know I always think awful things about myself like,  I'm not very good at this; everyone is doing a better job than me; I will always find easy tasks hard; what is wrong with me?  I would never believe those things about anyone else so why myself? If I were to talk to myself I would say, you are better than you think; you have qualities that other people do not have; there is a place for you!

4) Do something
The last tip is to do something. Instead of sitting there overthinking read a book, watch a film, write a blog post or do something to take your mind off things.

Thank you Katherine Tate for your tips! Read her post here: http://www.thequietlife.me/introvert-how-to-stop-overthinking-everything/

Do you have any tips on how to stop overthinking?

Thursday, 9 April 2015

Happy times...

I've had two weeks off work, I know lucky right? but I still find it hard to be happy because I spend most of my time worrying and being anxious about going back to work. Silly? Maybe? but telling myself that doesn't make it any easier.

Why do we always feel we need to BE HAPPY? Instead why don't we acknowledge those happy moments as what they are- moments. I know I will never be happy for a long amount of time and I don't mean that negatively :) Happiness is an emotion, just like sadness, and both can be as fleeting as each other. Anyway, I'm babbling and not explaining my thoughts properly haha!

Instead of babbling, here is a list of things that have made me happy this fortnight:



1. Spending time with my family
2. Sunshine
3. Eating out
4. The sea
5. Desserts
6. Quizzes and wine
7. Watching films (Blended and Katy Perry: Part of Me)
8. Easter dinner and Easter eggs
9. Music on a train journey home
10. Window views
11. Meeting friends for a good chat
12. Reading blogs on my new laptop
13. Early nights cwtched up in bed
14. Buying a new top
15. Things turning out better than I thought

I'm sure there are lots more! I hope to be more positive next week but maybe my anxiety will have other ideas. What makes you happy? Care to share?



Tuesday, 31 March 2015

Hello again and Hello Spring!

Hello!

It's been a while since I last posted. At first it was because I wasn't in the right mood to blog. I didn't feel my best and I was feeling quite stressed and down. Then, it was because my laptop broke :( I do miss my little netbook but I now have a new laptop which is quite nice as it is fresh. A fresh start.

Although, I currently have a blocked nose and feel quite shivery I am really excited for SPRING!! That is, days that feel like spring: sunshine, light nights, flowers and the feeling days shall be brighter in more ways than one!

So, to welcome Spring with open arms, here are some spring related pins from pinterest:
Source: molliemakes.com
Source: Unsure found on etsy.com
Source: etsy

Source: http://www.sandytoesandpopsicles.com/printables/free-spring-printable/      


What are you looking forward to this Spring?

Sunday, 8 February 2015

Inspiring art: Stella Maria Baer

 I am a fan of the moon. I love the beautiful light it shines in the dark sky. I love how it is a reminder of things greater than our little worries nagging away at our turbulent minds. I also love when I see pieces of art that capture the magic I see in the moon. Today, I found an artist named Stella Maria Baer that does just that. Below are some of her paintings and words are not needed to describe their beauty.








All images source: www.stellamariabaer.com




"The moon is a friend for the lonesome to talk to "
Carl Sandburg

Sunday, 25 January 2015

Things to remember

Well, this week has been hard for me. I have been feeling really low and depressed. Today, I still feel sad and anxious for the week ahead so I thought I would visit pinterest and and look at my remember board. Here are some of them:

Remember...
Source: Jessica Swift
 Remember... 
Source: Tumblr

 Remember...

Source: Tumblr      





What do you need to remember? What words inspire and uplift you?

Saturday, 17 January 2015

Quote of the week

Hello everyone!

So, sometimes the world sucks. Sometimes you need a good cry.
Sometimes:

"You cry a little, 
and then you wait for the sun to come out. 
It always does."




Saturday, 10 January 2015

Liebster award

Hello everyone!

Today's post is a little question and answer post as I got nominated for a Liebster award by Lidija
If you want to know more about this award, head over to her blog and read this post


Anyway, here are her questions:

1.Why did you start blogging?
I started blogging because I enjoy writing and I wanted a little space where I could write any mumbling thoughts, worries, ideas or interests. I wanted a place I could come to and write about anything and everything. I also hoped I would meet other bloggers who I shared things in common with. 
 
2.Fashion or beauty? Why?
Fashion because it can change your entire day. How you choose to dress says a lot about a person; fashion gives us an identity, a personal style and confidence. 
 
3.Favourite make up brand?
 I usually try different brands but I did buy myself a benefit foundation lately so, for now, I'll say benefit.
 
4,Favourite trend of 2014?
The tartan trend. Here's a blog post I wrote. I love the tartan scarves too. 
 
5,Your expectations for 2015?
I try not to expect too much for the year but wait and see what it brings my way.
 
6. What's your dream job?
I've always dreamed of being wealthy enough to be able to volunteer on various projects working with children in need. Not having to work for money but to work purely to help. 
 
7. Likes and dislikes?
Likes: music, the moon, family days out
Dislikes: tomatoes, airports, Sundays

8. Your favourite quote?
'My religion is simple. My religion is kindness' 
 
9. Who is your inspiration? Why?
Kind and positive people because I want to be more like them and I want the world to be filled with more of them.
 
10. Where would you like to travel and where would you like to live?
I've always wanted to tour America but I'm quite happy living in Wales.
 
11. Your favourite band/singer? 
One Republic

I am supposed to now nominate 11 other bloggers to answer my 11 questions below, however, as I don't know many bloggers yet I nominate whoever happens to read this post. Yes, YOU! 

Here are my questions:

1.What is your favourite blog?                                     7.What is your favourite TV show?
2. What is your favourite quote?                                   8. Do you own any pets?
3. What is your favourite song lyric?                             9. Savoury or sweet?
4. Best piece of advice you've been given?                   10. What is your favourite movie?
5.Do you have a favourite book?                                 11. Tell me one crazy ambition?
6.Which celebrity inspires you? 

Friday, 2 January 2015

Hello January

January always marks an end and a beginning. I read somewhere that January is named after the Roman God Janus who had two faces; one to look into the past and one to look into the future. I feel that this is very appropriate for January as I personally always find it a time of reflection, of the year that has past us by and come to an end, and a time of worry for the year ahead.

I had a good 2014. A very good 2014. I grew and developed and learned new skills. I faced challenges and overcame them. I had fun with family and friends and I stored some great memories. Thank you 2014!

2015  I am a little scared. What's in store? I still feel incapable. I still feel weak. What if I can't handle it? What if something awful is going to happen? WHAT IF, OH NO, I CAN'T, NOT ME, WORRY, FEAR, SADNESS.

The funny thing is I felt this in 2013 looking forwards into 2014 but.... I had a good 2014. A very good 2014. I grew and developed and learned new skills. I faced challenges and overcame them. I had fun with family and friends and I stored some great memories. Thank you 2014! 


So this is my quote of the New Year from Erin Hanson who I only discovered today. She writes with such beautiful spirit; check her out here 



 My wish this year for all of us is that we try not to worry about the what ifs of the year but instead let us have a year full of glorious and happy present moments. Let the year be filled with love, light and peace!